The Man Can Play

by Nick Delonas

The man can play
Well, I saw the doctor today and he said my best option was castration.
So I asked him, "Is it necessary? It seems a bit drastic."
He said, "no, but son, do you know what women are like?"
I said, "not really."

Well, he said, "have you ever heard the term 'succubus'?"
"No," I said.
He told me that's a woman who will suck the essence of life out of your very being.
So I asked, "Where does she suck it from?"

"Boy," he said, "would you rather be on a cruise ship with plenty of booze, pot, and naked super models or dead in a sewer having had the skin flailed from your bones?"
"The former I guess," I replied.
"And so you'd throw yourself into Satan's trap!" he said.
"Well yeah, like whatever," I told him.
"The naked super models sounded better to me than the sewer and flailed-skin thing."

("Do you know what women are like?")

("The man can play.")

"But they really aren't are they?" he asked.
"Unless you can play. Can you play my man, can you play?"

("The man can play.")

"Yeah right. I mean, God, Women are awesome."

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